LoveBlog - Why I've Dated Over 100 Men

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Mind you I didn't say have sex or even kiss with over a 100 men. I've dated them.  Some of these dates were dinner, some were meeting someone for coffee, some adventure, some boring, some thrilling but all worth it, if only for the education but also because a girls gotta eat! Still, Why did I do this? Many reasons but the main one was that my father told me to. As a young girl, my father told me to date 100 men before I get married. This way I know what I want, what I don't want in a relationship and in a partner. Doing so, I also get to know myself before committing to someone. Dating 100 men allows me to not be in a rush to get married. As my great grandmother said, "If you want to get married in the worst way, you usually do."  Let that sink in for a moment. 

I know for myself, I have a tendency to jump into things head first. Especially when I really like someone. My world becomes them. It took a long time, some tears, heartaches and healing to realize a relationship or marriage isn't the end game, it's the growth. In the past I learned many of my love lessons the hard way. Years ago, I changed and allowed myself the opportunity to learn my lessons in a loving, gentle way. Man, has that made all the difference in my life! 

Have you heard the joke about the man that walks into his doctors office and starts hitting his head and says "Doctor it hurts when I do this!" The doctor looks at him and says, "then stop doing that."  That was me for sue! Relationships don't have to be as difficult as we think they need to be. You can still have passion without the fights and struggles. You can fight fair. You can grow strong. But first, you need to know who you are and love yourself for who you are. Every bit! The light and the dark. Because the dark helps us to grow. To know where we need help. To know where we can improve. Where our soul wants to grow towards. Which is always the light. Like a lotus flower that grows from the mud and darkness and reaches for the surface, so are we. 

In the single world, we call this dating. We are in the muck, mud and darkness reaching for the light. Each date gets us closer to the light within ourselves. Eventually, we emerge and that light connects to another's light and we call it marriage or reconnects us to ourselves (some people find it tough to beat being alone).

So before you try to rush into the light, spend time in the mud.  Be safe of course. But allow yourself time. Think of dating as the time you have to do some solo healing and have fun with it. Maybe even play the count down game.  Date 100 men before even thinking of settling down. 

And if you're already committed to someone, make time for 100 dates with each other. Doesn't have to be anything special. Just little dates to get to know each other in a different way. Start small, easy and light with coffee in the morning. Work up to the thrilling. Use these 100 dates to get to know yourself through your partner. These 100 dates may just be the adventure of a lifetime! 

Which brings us to today's Love tip. Know and love yourself before you get to know and commit to someone else. 

Please notice that I didn't say love. Love should not have conditions. Love freely but commit consciously. 

If you found this post to be helpful, please share. And if there's someone you think would benefit from it, please forward onto them. If you like this post and would love more love sent to you join the LoveLetter here. It's free! Just the way love should be.

Please find the Nantucket Dharma Yoga teacher schedule below, which includes the classes I guide as well as the other teachers.  And if you would like a private session with me which includes any combination relationship coaching, self-love, mediation, healing and yoga, contact me at 508-221-3394 or email me, Dorothy@DorothydStover.com. Peace, Love & Hugs!

 

For class changes and to book your spot, click here .

Sundays

8:15 am - 9:30 am Dharma Yoga all levels

10:00 am - 11:15 am Restorative Yoga

4:30pm - 5:45pm All levels. Free donation based class. Dorothy Stover. This Sunday the proceeds will benefit A Safe Place. 

Mondays

8:15 am - 9:30 am Alignment Based Hatha Sheri Perelman

10:00 am - 11:15 am Dharma Yoga all levels Joann Burnham

10:30 am - 11:45 am Aerial Yoga Sheri Perelman

5:30 pm - 6:45 pm All Levels Ted Burnham

Tuesdays

7:00 am - 8:00 am Hatha Dorothy Stover

8:15 am - 9:30 am Dharma Yoga all levels Joann Burnham

10:00 am - 11:15 am Somatic Movement and Stretch  Lynne Begier

10:30 am - 11:45 am Aerial YogaJoann Burnham

5:30 pm - 6:45 pm Dharma Yoga all levelsJoann Burnham

Wednesdays 

8:15 am - 9:30 am Alignment Based Hatha Sheri Perelman

10:00 am - 11:15 am Restorative Yoga Sheri Perelman

10:30 am - 11:45 am Aerial YogaDorothy Stover

5:30 pm - 6:45 pm HathaDorothy Stover

Thursdays

7:00 am - 8:00 am HathaDorothy Stover

8:15 am - 9:30 am Dharma Yoga all levels Joann Burnham

10:00 am - 11:15 am Somatic Movement and Stretchlynne begier

10:30 am - 11:45 am Aerial YogaJoann Burnham

5:30 pm - 6:45 pm Dharma Yoga all levelsJoann Burnham

Fridays

8:15 am - 9:30 am Alignment Based HathaSheri Perelman

10:00 am - 11:15 am Dharma Yoga all levelsJoann Burnham

10:30 am - 11:45 am Restorative Aerial YogaSheri Perelman

5:30 pm - 6:45 pm Candlelight Restorative joann and ted

Saturdays

  8:15 am - 9:30 am Dynamic Yogalynne begier

10:00 am - 11:15 am Somatic Movement and Stretchlynne begier

We look forward to sharing space with you. Namaste 

Dorothy